You called me almost every single morning, I remember that. You would say how you loved me and couldn't stand the distance, how your heart was going to explode.
My mind moves to Oregon in 2008, sitting on the beach watching the ocean roll in. I remember how static clouded our conversation because the reception was terrible. I remember that call ending, saying goodbye, and how I just sat there writing "I Love You" in the sand and letting the incoming water wash away my words like the shake of an etch-a-sketch, only so I could write them again. I repeated this for some time...those words, because I felt them.
I remember the first time we said those words to each other. I was sweating and my lip was trembling. I was so choked up the words came out like a gasp and you almost missed them, but you were tuned in. A huge smile spread across your face and your eyes sparkled, you almost cried...I almost cried. We held each other long that night, not letting sleep get in the way of the moment. We were holding on like I held your picture in my wallet, never wanting to let our love slip. I remember coming home from Oregon. I pulled that picture out and let it slowly slip from my grasp, the breeze carrying it, carrying you away from me and settling in Eugene. I left you there because I was coming home...home to you. I heard about your evening lover in Europe. I spit when I think of how I drove to Omaha so early in the morning to welcome you back...how we held each other in the terminal. How I shouted "I Love You" at the top of my lungs like they do in the movies or on those commercials for expensive diamonds. I hope your happy now in your big city life. I hope your life turns out perfectly. I hope you take over some company and have more money than God.
I'm just happy I know the real you. after all this time I see you clearly.
As for me, I will continue to smile wholeheartedly and drink all the booze. Cheers!
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